But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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