how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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