Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
