So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
