I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize
