if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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