hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I am naked and annoyed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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