I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
