ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
My pussy is not your playground.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize