look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
27 People Confess The Worst Jobs They’ve Ever Had
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
25 People Confess Their Terrifying Stalker Stories
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it