Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
