So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize