I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
