Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He? As in you personified your dick?
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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