Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Randomize