He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
