his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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