office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
