may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Panties = found
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
