I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
