I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
