Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I want to be your penis for a week.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
