She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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