i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
