we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
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