Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Randomize
