I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Randomize
