Don't you send me to vm
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Randomize
