She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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