its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
