so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize