It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Randomize
