There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
21 Of The Most Regrettable Tattoo Ideas Ever
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party