I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Randomize
