okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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