I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Randomize
