Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Randomize
