i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
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