I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize