dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
