I'm going to jail i love you
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
