They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
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