After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
