when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Randomize
