Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
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