Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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