Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
So much rum. So many feels.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
