So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
