planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Randomize
