You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
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