singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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