What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Randomize
